From Cat Food to Clickbait

The Evolution of Irresistible Convenience Food

Cats
Macklin and Lenny

Out in the unsettling world of clickbait, family pets seem to have a special place in the pantheon of what the bored or purposeless internet user finds irresistible. So here’s a story of Macklin and Lenny, the two cats I feed each morning but I am sure you are neither bored nor purposeless and that is a good thing, as there’s a purpose in this tale.

Lenny and Macklin are brothers but are a striking contrast to one another, both in appearance and character.  Macklin is slim, very smart, hyperactive, while Lenny is solidly built, indolent and — it grieves me to say it — would not score well in a cat IQ test. That’s Macklin sitting on a fence post and Lenny posing in a laundry basket, unsure of what to do next.

I love them both of course, but that’s not the point. When they first came into our home, we provided dried cat food ad lib. That was very convenient  and seemed to work well for the cats, even if Lenny was a little greedy for his meals and gained weight. But then he developed a problem. He became bunged up. I’ll spare you the details, but veterinary intervention was required and the vet made it clear that his fluid intake was insufficient relative to the quantity he was eating. 

How do you explain to a cat that he really needs to drink more? Availability of water had not been the problem. We didn’t dwell on this question for too long before deciding that we should move Lenny  onto wet cat food. Actually, that meant both cats moving onto the wet stuff. 

From the outset  this change suited them very well, so we thought we’d cracked it; wet food was the answer. When we ran out of supplies we went to the supermarket to pick up some more of Brand A, but it wasn’t available. We bought some sachets of Brand B. I was shocked when they refused to eat it. They wanted the original stuff and they really let me know that was the case. They started to behave like the food critics on Masterchef.

Of course you can’t stand by and watch your cat starve. So,we sourced some of Brand A, and that did the trick for the time being. But suddenly we were in a new world of cat food gastronomy and the little quirks of their fussy eating became a daily battle. What would they eat? What would they not eat? We tried brand C, but only brand A did the trick. 

In my youth I seem to remember cat food being pretty homogeneous stuff that came out of a tin, the scrapings of meat that was not considered fit for human consumption.  Now it is all sachets and secret ingredients. Somethings going on. 

It’s clear that in the cat food business, a small investment in finding the magic formula to hook a cat can lead to a big reward. Incrementally, the whole marketing process becomes refined, each cat food company competing for market share with increasingly sophisticated advertising, packaging and, of course, a recipe irresistible to your cat. 

Well, you may ask: If cats are happy, what’s the problem? Who’s dead?  

Concerned as I am for cats, I have a wider concern. The food industry is not just trying to seduce cats through a process of inexorable marginal product refinement; all of us are on the receiving end of this fiendish process. And, as Chris Van Tulleken lays bare in his BBC 2 documentary Irresistible Why We Can’t Stop Eating,  quite a lot of us are ill and dying early as a consequence. [1]

That might seem counterintuitive given that our population is ageing. It’s true that the rich and educated are, on average, living longer. The poor, less so. They are eating cheap processed food, becoming obese, diabetic, and developing a multitude of health problems. This bleak picture is somewhat complicated by the way in which individual metabolism responds to modern diet. Not every person on a poor diet gets sick, but circumstantial evidence of the scale of the problem is there to see in the doctor’s waiting room, the hospital queue, in the high street of your town.  The problem, Van Tulleken suggests, is Ultra Processed Foods.

In 2009 Carlos Monteiro, working with a team of researchers at the University of São Paulo, coined this term. A key ingredient of an Ultra Processed Food are laboratory produced ingredients not to be found in a normal kitchen; preservatives, flavourings, emulsifiers. [2]  

Chris Van Tulleken interviews a series of scientists who have worked in different parts of the food industry. One by one they testify to the sophistication of the development process, the juggling of ingredients, getting the “mouthfeel” just right, the testings and tastings  — all of the elements that combine to produce a product which, eaten once, we just can’t pass by in the supermarket.

Henry Dimbleby in his book Ravenous sets out the  statistical evidence:  A “10% increase in the proportion of ultra-processed foods in a person’s diet is correlated with a 12% increase in cancers, a 21% increase in depressive symptoms, and a 12% increase in cardiovascular disease risk”  

In July 2020 Dimbleby led the team writing the National Food Strategy. This proposed actions to help disadvantaged children and to promote environmental and animal welfare standards. The recommendations for disadvantaged children were supported by Marcus Rashford in his 2020 Covid-related campaign but largely ignored by the then Conservative UK Government. Their friends and funders in the food industry may just have had something to do with this.  [3]

Professor Tim Spector is a particularly significant critic of Ultra Processed Foods. He  has written a series of books which overturn many commonly understood ideas about what constitutes a good diet. The subtitle of his 2020 publication, Spoonfed, tells us a good deal about just how radical his ideas are:  “ Why almost everything we’ve been told about food is wrong.”  

Someone not wishing to read their way through his excellent back catalogue would be well advised to move straight to his recently published Food for Life cookbook. The introduction is an excellent and up to date summary of the science and arguments which support what he is saying. Crucial to this perspective are  the millions of microorganisms that live in your gut. He explains in plain language the recent  science which shows how this microbiome influences your health and how changes to your diet may tip the balance of its constituents in your favour or to your detriment. 

His recipes will have more immediate appeal to the adventurer in food than the neophobe, but Tim Spector’s approach is realistic and practical and avoids punitive regimes. He is determined to ensure the food you eat will remain one of the pleasures in your life. If your diet is in a bad place, you can  change what you eat incrementally and feel better for it, at every stage. Indeed, even if you think your diet is pretty good, Prof Tim will likely give you some interesting and, for the open minded, tasty suggestions on how it could be even better. 

His focus is not just on health. He is also concerned with the impact of food production on the environment and its overall sustainability. Above all, he is a relentless critic of the food industry. We may expect some fierce pushback from their outriders as the debate unravels. 

Endnotes

[1]  Irresistible: Why We Can’t Stop Eating   

[2] Carlos Monteiro and UPFs  I’ve heard UPFs called Frankenstein food, but that does not seem accurate to me. We do not recoil from them — rather the contary.

[3] Henry Dimbleby  Ravenous  Highly recommended! I heard Henry Dimbleby interviewed by Gavin Esler at Wigtown Book Festival in October 2023. The Festival is always a great day out, but this was a really splendid event.

[4] Tim Spector   The Food for Life Cookbook   If it’s the cookbook you’re wanting, be careful not to buy Food for Life, also  by Tim Spector. It’s an interesting read — but not a cookbook!

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From Apex Predators to the hidden World of Mycorrhiza

I’ve never been much of a bird watcher. I can just about name the birds that turn up at my feeders, which occasionally include some eye-catching specimens. Greater spotted woodpeckers come from the woods nearby for peanuts and there’s also delicately coloured nuthatches, and even, once, a green parakeet, blown north by a storm, no doubt. They are a commonplace now in London, I believe. Occasionally there is a great scattering of birds at our feeders and that’s generally all that I see of the sparrowhawk when it calls. But my attention has also been drawn to less showy visitors; for example, a little drab bird, distinguished mostly by a rich brown cap. I’m told that’s a tree sparrow, the population of which has been in a severe decline since 1970, a fall estimated at 93% in 2008. Real birdwatchers notice and thrill at such modesties, while I must have their significance pointed out to me.   

Apart from an inexplicable fondness for those untidy black marauders, corvids, my real thrill as a dilettante birdwatcher would be to see a golden eagle. I have never managed a confirmed sighting. I look out for them in the Galloway and the Moffat hills, occasionally have seen something flying high above and have squinted hopefully but have been forced to conclude it is probably a buzzard, a fine bird in its own right but not at the apex: perhaps it was an eagle, but I remain uncertain. 

I could not resist the lure of the Dumfriesshire and Galloway Natural History and Antiquarian Society talk given by Philip Munro on  The South of Scotland Golden Eagle Project. Eagles in South West Scotland have, for many years, been a population just limping along, no match for the iconic golden eagle presence in the highlands. The South of Scotland Golden Eagle Project has been doing something to correct this imbalance. 

The talk was illustrated with beautiful video clips showing how, in the Highlands, single chicks are carefully removed from nests containing two or more hatchlings. Where there are twin birds, or triplets, generally only one would be likely to survive to maturity. The strongest chick may even kill its sibling. The captive birds are removed to pens in the south of Scotland and nurtured until their release into the southern hills.

Phil Munro presented a slide which summarised the great variety of species on which golden eagles feed: badgers, hare, rabbits, red squirrels, grey squirrels, grouse. Although concerns exist about predation on lambs, no evidence has been observed during the project’s time-frame. Indeed the impact on other species of the approximately fifty birds now present in the South of Scotland was, he suggested, hardly discernible. Much of the food is taken as carrion so, already deceased, just tidying up really. But those red and grey squirrels inevitably raise a question of balance in such matters. If they are just taking greys, well fine, but what about the threatened reds? 

Patrick Laurie writes eloquently in his blog, Bog Myrtle & Peat, about the decline of ground nesting birds in South West Scotland, in particular of curlews. In  a previous era these birds were plentiful and could coexist with farming practices, but there has been a long slow decline disguised by the longevity of the curlew which returns each year to try again to raise a couple of chicks, only, once again, to fail.

The  precise reasons for this remain mysterious though there are many suspects; foxes, badgers, crows, red kites – another recent reintroduction to the area, now thriving spectacularly. In the circumstances Patrick Laurie’s defence of moorland managed for grouse shooting, in which context a range of other species, including ground nesting birds can thrive, is easy to understand. Achieving a balance of habitats in which the widest range of species can coexist is not an easy matter. We can be clear, however, that certain types of economic forestry and industrial farming practices are, plain and simple, habitat destroyers. 

Part of the problem, in terms of public understanding of the issues, is the appeal of apex predators and other iconic species at the expense of a diversity of life of which a public, with a short attention span, is simply unaware. 

Merlin Sheldrake’s programme Fungi: Web of Life – currently available to stream from BBC iPlayer – is a reminder of exactly this problem of invisibility.  It is beautifully made with wonderful time lapse photography revealing the multicoloured and endless variety of fungal fruit bodies; but more striking still, is the revelation that the most significant part of this little understood part of the plant world is the vast network of mycelium which lie beneath the surface and which draw nutrients in whilst at the same time supporting the plethora of other plant species on which they depend. Nearly 90% of the iceberg which sank the Titanic lay invisible beneath the surface and, so it is also, with fungi. 

Merlin Sheldrake is a low key presence in the programme, a tall slim figure with a flop of hair, prowling about in the background of a Tasmanian forest, as if he himself were an endangered species. Much of the voice over comes from Bjork, her Icelandic intonation adding to the transcendent appeal of the production. 

So, thank you Philip Munro for your work on the South of Scotland Golden Eagle project but thank you also Merlin Sheldrake for reminding us that what at first may seem insignificant, on closer inspection, can prove to be beyond anything we might have imagined. 

Endnotes

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The Climate Kitchen and the Ghost of Christmas Past

It has not been a good week for the planet and I was doubtful the Dumfries Climate Kitchen could raise my spirits in the wake of what has just happened in the USA, where Donald Trump’s nominee for Attorney General has been under suspicion of sex trafficking, his nominee for Health Secretary, is a vaccine sceptic and, amongst those who have elected him, support for fracking and drilling is  a badge of honour. 

I made my way up Bank Street from the river and began to thread a path through the  festive gathering in front of the Midsteeple. Those present had come to witness the switching on of the town’s Christmas lights. Milling around me were moody teenagers and families with young and excited children. I could feel the great Christmas juggernaut  cranking into life. A  song I know well played on the PA:

It’s comin’ on Christmas

They’re cuttin’ down trees

They’re puttin’ up reindeer

And singin’ songs of joy and peace  

For me, in mid November, Christmas is something I’d prefer not even to be thinking about, but I could see those around me were happily embracing the spirit of the event. And as it turned out, on reaching the far side of the concourse and entering the building of The Stove Network and Cafe, I found the Climate Kitchen offering their own Xmas vision. Set out on two floors of the building was a Climate Conscious Christmas Market. This offered a gentle challenge to the unrestrained consumer blowout which has come to define the close of our year. 

The Climate Kitchen certainly wasn’t taking its lead from Just Stop Oil, which might incline more towards a Just Stop Christmas approach to the matter. I had been sent a link earlier in the day to a petition initiated by Just Stop Oil, inviting the Government to run a public information campaign on the climate crisis. That seems a modest request. I signed it. Maybe you would like to think about signing too? I’ll put the link in the endnotes.

The Market featured, amongst other things, an opportunity to  rent-a-Christmas tree, the idea being that you return your tree when the season is over. All being well, it will live to adorn further Christmases until it is just too big to fit any available domestic space. At that  point it will be set free to grow to maturity. 

The market also featured an eye-catching workshop offering instruction in the art of Japanese scarf-wrapping for gifts. Once the gifts are unwrapped, the scarves are carefully folded away for the next time. 

The focus of the other stalls was more conventionally commercial, offering artisanal gifts from natural materials, but I will also mention the workshop which invited us to reflect on how Christmas has changed over the years.  

My earliest memories of the season come from the late 1950s through the 1960s, growing up in Newry, Co.Down. I would rise on Christmas morning, excited to receive a few trinkets, brought to me by a Santa Claus in whom, from an early age, I did not believe. There was rarely snow on the ground other than in the Christmas cards, but frost was a commonplace.  I went with my parents and my two elder brothers to St. Patrick’s on the hill. We drove  past little houses each, it seemed, with a single illuminated star hanging in a front window. The church service we attended, with its carols and readings from the Gospels, was a part of the ritual of the day which I sat through, impatient for it to be done.  We returned home to eat our turkey, roast potatoes and sprouts, followed by Christmas pudding. Presents were given out in the afternoon. I never received the binoculars that I always said I wanted. In the evening there was rich fruit cake, with a generous layer of marzipan and icing, followed by Morecambe and Wise on the black and white TV. I loved it all. 

I don’t go to church anymore or believe in the Christmas story, other than as some kind of allegory. I still enjoy Christmas. There’s just too much of it for me. If I had my way, there would be no Christmas music or decorations or lights before mid-December. But I know that ain’t gonna happen and I’ll just have to make the best of what is on offer and hope I never tire of listening to A Fairy Tale of New York.  

Eleanor Farjeon captures something of what has been eclipsed by the jamboree of commerce which Christmas has become. I don’t think religious belief is really necessary to be touched by her message.

Christmas Carol

God bless your house this Holy night,

   And all within it:

God bless the candle that you light,

  To midnight’s minute;

The board at which you break your bread,

  The cup you drink of:

And as you raise it, the unsaid

   Name you think of:

The warming fire, the bed of rest,

   The ringing laughter:

These things and all things else be blest

   From floor to rafter

This Holy night, from dark to light,

   Even more than other:

And if you have no house to-night,

   God bless you brother.

Endnotes

Petition  https://petition.parliament.uk/petitions/700189 

The Climate Kitchen  https://climatekitchen.co.uk/ 

The Stove Network and Cafe  https://thestove.org/ 

The Climate Conscious Christmas Market

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The Role of Schooling in the Rise and Rise Again of Donald Trump

This gallery contains 3 photos.

Anthony Scaramucci tells many amusing stories arising from his brief period as White House Director of Communications in the first Trump administration. For me the most striking of these relate to Trump’s difficulties with the written word, his reluctance, for example, to … Continue reading

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This is Robert Rutherford Speaking. What can I do for you?

I was lucky enough to be in attendance at a book launch in Dumfries’s Coach and Horses to celebrate the publication of Pete Fortune’s two books of short stories, Waving at Strangers in Passing Cars and A Pauper from Irishgait Tannery an ither  stories in Scots.  Readings from both of these works  featured in the event and I was particularly pleased to be introduced  to the surreal though “…Incomplete Guide to Robert Rutherford” the tale of a wrong number as the opening of a door to infinite possibility. 

In a catalogue of performances from local and not so local poets this willingness to engage with  unlikely twists and turns was strongly featured. Hugh McMillan, who hosted the event, at one point offered the seemingly improbable proposition that “poets don’t drive” and then added, in his address to this room full of poets, “And if you do drive, stop! You’ll be a better poet!”  

By way of justifying this unlikely assertion, he then read us a poem which had arisen from a “three day” (possible hyperbole?) odyssey on public transport from his home in Penpont to the Wigtown Book Festival in 2022.  The  poem centred on an encounter in a pub in Newton Stewart with a man who had just bought a crossbow at a car boot sale. Why, other than for obvious reasons of conviviality, was MacMillan in that particular pub? Because, through the window he could see the arrival of the bus which would take him on to Wigtown. 

Being a poet, McMillan would never be likely to reflect on the explicit environmental and situational advantages of eschewing the private car as a means of transport. Having never been accused of being a poet I feel more freedom to digress on the matter.  The electric car is seen by many as a solution to at least one aspect of the gathering climate crisis. It is a seductive notion, but pause for a moment to consider what has just happened: the elevation of Elon Musk, a man with a vision of a world so overstuffed with electric cars that he is planning an escape route to Mars for himself and a few others. 

I am not a poet, and so will continue for the time being to rely on the five wheeled incubus that sits outside my house. Maybe I’ll even upgrade to an electric version. But Hugh McMillan’s got a point. Philip Larkin couldn’t drive and favoured a bicycle for his visits to country churches. One of his finest poems was written following a train journey to London. And for the record: it was a surprisingly mild November night. Some might say, too mild. I decided to travel to Pete’s book launch by bike.  

Endnotes

List of those scheduled to read at the event.

[Corrections and updates to match the actual roster of those who appeared would be welcome at stephen.shellard@carruchan.blog ]

Part One

Douglas Lipton

Tom Murray

Andy Murray

Stuart Paterson

Derek Ross

Mark Thomas

Pete Fortune

Part Two

Morag Fortune

Martin Goldie

Charlie Gracie

Angus MacMillan

Hugh McMillan

Julie McNeill

Pete Fortune

Liz Niven

Clare Phillips

Drunk Muse Press

https://www.drunkmusepress.com/about Where the work of a good many of those reading can be purchased.

Pete Fortune

Pete’s work available on Amazon . To purchase copies of Waving at Strangers in Passing Cars and A Pauper from Irishgait Tannery an ither  stories in Scots, message Pete on Facebook or contact him on golferfortune@hotmail.com Pete, by the way, claims never to have swung a golf club.

The Audience … who was present?

In coming years this photo may help, when people who weren’t present at this soon to be legendary event, claim to have been there.

Picture from Pete Fortune’s Facebook page.

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Time for a Detox

Toxic culture sparks school strike threats! 

This headline,  referring to a fairly newly built Dumfries multi school complex, was recently drawn to my attention. Toxic culture seems a rather vague term and in discussion of the topic I suggested that a failure to properly manage problem pupil behaviour was often at the root of staff unrest, and in the subsequent back and forth of this conversation the problems arising from the experience of Covid, increasing defiance of some pupils in the face of teacher authority and  parents often weighing in to give support to their offspring all being reported. In a former era, a reflexive deference would have been more likely to kick in, with parents giving their backing to the school.

A teacher friend pointed out the pressures arising from a performance indicator driven culture. This is a top down system, put in place by educational leaders who have not been in front of a class for some time and, it was suggested, have not fully understood the shifting ground on which teachers are now operating. 

Way back in 2004 a Labour/LibDem coalition in the Scottish Parliament set in motion the Curriculum for Excellence (CfE), a vision of a school curriculum which could be flexible and inclusive of all, regardless of background ability and inclination.  This developing project was adopted by the incoming SNP administration, under the leadership of Shona Hyslop, and finally implemented in 2010.

I became aware of the policy in 2007, when I was seconded to Dumfries and Galloway Council from Dumfries and Galloway College, to become, for two years, the More Choices More Chances Implementation Officer.  I thought the ambition  of the Curriculum for Excellence very pertinent indeed to the needs of the group of young people, not in employment, education or training, that  the More Choices More Chances initiative was trying to serve. CfE was, I thought,  a brave attempt to create a flexibility in the school curriculum which would meet the needs of all learners. The private sector often does this better for paying customers who will not accept a null outcome for their progeny, and so every effort is made to find what will engage an individual and allow them to develop.  This is not an argument for private education but rather an argument for the state to find a constructive way forward for every young person. 

Even in 2007 I could see  there was resistance in the secondary sector and amongst educational managers to the idealism embedded in the CfE. Later, when back in College, I had some experience of what may have been at the root of this disquiet. I had been assigned to the delivery of a Psychology Higher as part of the Schools-College link outreach. I went out to work in Kirkcudbright Academy, Dalbeattie High School  and Annan Academy to deliver the course as it was then structured.  There was something bargain basement about the whole deal, not  least  my own questionable qualification to deliver a course in  psychology at Higher level.  Anyway, I was willing, and mostly quite enjoying the experience of this teaching, but then I was made part of a College team to develop the new CfE version of Higher Psychology, which gave much more freedom to students to come up with their own projects and do their own research. I was an enthusiast. 

Suffice to say, the College was a bit ahead of the game so far as this development was concerned, but when I started to deliver the new Higher, I met with a lot of pupil resistance, and in one case, something of a rebellion. I’ll spare you the unsavoury details.  “Just give us the answers,” I think is a fair summary of what my classes were saying. Perhaps seduced by the glamour of the subject, they had mostly signed up as a way of getting an extra higher in one year through a programme of rote learning. One member of my class even spoke about wanting to do a “crash higher.” She was not at all happy about the demands that the CfE Higher appeared to be making. Some pupils responded really well, but mostly these were the smartest and best motivated. Others really hated it. The idea that psychology could be studied on the basis of a personal interest and enquiry into the subject had no appeal for these students whatsoever.  

I could see that an anxiety about passing exams underlay this resistance to the CfE, but that there were ambitious parents in the background, also concerned about this new direction of travel, which they probably perceived as wishy-washy, woke, nonsense. And then of course there were the school teaching staff, already lining up to call a halt to the whole exercise and not entirely displeased to witness my struggles.

I modified my approach in subsequent years, pulling the delivery back to something more aligned with the students’ learning experience in their schools. For all of this compromise, my perception was that some students really got a lot out of this more flexible delivery. I came to enjoy teaching the new CfE Higher, but the positive student engagement was not consistently matched by favourable exam outcomes. Constructive participation in the weekly class discussion and activities was not always  enough to raise the standard of the project submitted for assessment and performance in the end of course grade examination.  There was no place for the highly commended I would have liked to award many of these students who were left with nothing for their commitment. 

I retired at the beginning of the pandemic and don’t know what has happened to the CfE in the meantime. Technology has moved on a great deal since it was introduced in 2010. So much now can be learnt independently online, whether it’s how to fix your mower with a YouTube video presented by someone in the USA or Bulgaria, or learning a language with Duolingo or a podcast. And now AI is about to further upturn the apple-cart. If I’d had ChatGPT when I was in school, I’d have been using it to do my maths problems and write my essays – more time for football don’t you know!  Let’s face it. The role of the teacher as we knew it in those days, before a fully developed Internet and the arrival of Artificial Intelligence, is gone.

I stand by my enthusiasm for the Curriculum for Excellence but the time has now come, in the light of these new tools, to completely rethink education, particularly so, in the secondary and further education sectors. 

Endnotes

Featured image generated with WordPress AI.

BBC News Industrial action threat over school’s ‘toxic culture’

Curriculum for Excellence https://education.gov.scot/curriculum-for-excellence/

Billy Dodds

Billy Dodds is always chattering

About the folk that he’s been battering

He would give a hen a kicking

Just to prove he isna chicken.

Verse written about a pupil in Elmbank, Lovers Walk, Dumfries, when I was a special needs auxilliary there back in the late 1980s. Elmbank took in excluded pupils from a number of secondary schools in Dumfries and Galloway. Billy Dodds is not the real name of the pupil who was this inspiration for this verse.

Here’s a verse, written in less than 10 seconds, by CHATGPT, to the instruction: Write a four line verse about a teenager who boasts about his fighting abilities. I think mine’s better by the way, but that’s not quite the point.

In the alley shadows, he struts with pride,
Claims he’s a champ, never backs down from a fight.
With fists like thunder, he’s quick to ignite,
But deep down, he knows it’s just talk in the night

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Nate’s Forge

Thornhill was busy today, and my usual parking spot near the Drumlanrig Cafe was unavailable. By chance, I found a space at the Old School, located behind Nate’s forge. Frequent visitors to Thornhill will likely know of the giant fork leaning against the two-storey sandstone villa that stands at the top of the driveway leading to the forge. If you’re unfamiliar with Thornhill and would like to see this unusual piece of art, turn east in the town centre and head towards the hills. Soon, you’ll come to a divide in the road marked by a statue of the explorer Joseph Thomson. Take the left turn and, just beyond the rows of cars awaiting service, you’ll see the giant table fork up the driveway on your right. Having been here before, it wasn’t too much of a surprise to look over the wall round the back of the forge and catch sight of a giant cat stretching up into the branches of what could have been an apple tree, a scene perhaps out of Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland. But it was just Nate up to his tricks. The cat is an eye catching departure from his trademark blacksmithing. Dinosaurs form a conspicuous part of his work, but beautifully wrought highland cattle, sheep, goats and birds all emerge from the modest space of his workshop, a restored single-storey sandstone outbuilding tucked round the back of the house with the fork.

I returned to my car a little later in the day and this time there was a living and breathing cat sitting on the wall, black and white and bearing a striking resemblance to the giant in the background. In that serendipitous moment, Nate himself appeared from the back door of his forge and stopped for a chat. He was happy to confirm my surmise that I was now in the presence of the model and inspiration for his creation. With a little coaxing, the cat obliged by turning towards the camera for a photo. “So what?” it seemed to say.

Nate’s Forge https://www.natesforge.uk/

Old School Thornhill https://www.oldschoolthornhill.com/

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In the Eyrie

What a pleasure it was to participate in the Wigtown Book Festival Southlight Launch which took place in the eyrie of the Nature Room, perched on the top floor of the County Buildings. It’s definitely the best Southlight Event I’ve been to yet, everything from the latecomers crashing in from the pub, through Angus’s assault on the bagpipes and including a range of newcomers and old hands. Sometimes I’ve struggled to hear at these events, something to do with my own auditory failings, no doubt, but also related to big airy venues with  difficult acoustics or amplification that has seemed more of a problem than a solution; but this time, all was well, and the quality of the readings came through. I dare say there is much bad poetry being written but what is remarkable is just how much good work there is being wrung out in obscure corners by writers who deserve to be heard. I am sure every part of the country has its work-shopped output of verse and writers who fall short, at least for now, of whatever mysterious ingredient it takes to achieve a national profile; but they can be a speciality of the region, as much as the local cheese or beer or bread or landscape or dialect or history. Robin Leiper for example, with his take on the Raeburn exhibition at Kirkcudbright Gallery in August just past, which, by the way, I enjoyed very much, but I do get it when he says;

 I recognise it 

all too well: that sense of smugness

settling like smog upon the spirit

the smirk, a seasoning of the sentimental.

The background photoshopped to black

obliterates the source of the cash.

And then there was  Lesley Buchan Donald’s poem, Chat’s Willie.  I can struggle with Scots writing but this seemed uncompromising yet accessible. 

Chat’s Wullie

Feet plantit he stauns as if still on deck

squintin intil the sun

Skin daurkent by years at the fishin

Cou’s lick o snaw white hair an Desperate Dan chin

Ane haund in his pooch

Weel worn weskit an knittit tie

Lang drawers keekin abuin the waistbaund o his breeks

Wearin his echty odd years lichtly

The accompanying photo of Chat’s Wullie was definitely a help to this listener, and a striking image in its own right.

Drunk Muse Press, with its publication of often neglected writers, deserves mention in this celebration of the local, but there are plenty of other gems in Southlight 36.  To order a copy, go to http://www.southlight.ukwriters.net/bookshop.html 

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The Open Book!

A Day Out at Wigtown Book Festival 2024, with a Spotlight on New Authors,  Regenerative Agriculture and Artificial Intelligence

Together  with John Atkinson and Glen Stanfield, I was a guest at  the Spotlight on New Authors, hosted by Open Book, as part of the Wigtown Book Festival 2024. It was a small event, the venue by no means overwhelmed, but the readings, ten minutes each, and the subsequent discussion, made for a very enjoyable hour. Contributory to this was the mix of genres, John, a poet, a lover of  Seamus Heaney, Ted Hughes, Dylan Thomas; and Glen, a writer of crime fiction, his hero, or greatest influence perhaps, Terry  Pratchett and not —  as I hinted in my question to him later, Lee Child, who he doesn’t really like. Then there was my own offering, an extract from my memoir, Remembered Fragments, recalling a night out with a gang of Irish navvies to celebrate the end of my short spell labouring on the construction of a link from the M4 to the town of Reading. Much drink was taken. “When a mug full of vodka was handed to me, I realised the evening had just begun.”

John will shortly publish a book of poems with Drunk Muse Press, edited by Hugh McMillan. Glen is on his fifth novel and obviously has a loyal fan base. The discussion at the conclusion of the readings, which could easily have fallen flat, somehow took off and became diverse and interesting. Everything from Obliquity — the title of one of John’s poems, concerning the tilt of the earth, so vital to our seasonal variations — to desperate stories of human trafficking, the raw material for Glen’s most recent book, Out of Darkness. And then there was my own turn to field questions; “What would my next book be?”  A reflection, perhaps, — I extemporised — on  the divisive character of our education system: how it works so well for some but is an unfulfilling trial for others.  I argued that these distinct experiences have marked us all deeply and fed the political polarisation which is abroad in our culture. As Glen put it succinctly at the conclusion of my ramblings: “One size does not fit all.”

I thank the organisers of the Wigtown Book Festival for providing this opportunity for locally based writers and the two ladies from the United States, airbnb proprietors of Open Book for just a week, for being such welcoming hosts. 

While the event itself was a rewarding experience, my attempts to gain visibility for my book in local bookshops were less successful. I tried several and explained that I had been a participant in the Spotlight event.  Would they be willing to take a few copies of my book on a sale-or-return basis?  The answer in each case was a polite refusal. I am aware that new writing is a very mixed bag, not in general a great commercial proposition and much of it will be forgotten before the year is out. But surely the organisers of the Festival could organise some bookshop space for the display and, who knows, even the sale of the work of our local aspirant writers. At the very least those featured in the Spotlight event deserve this opportunity.

To be fair, my investigation into the matter did generate a number of sympathetic conversations, and I was not so cast down by my refusals as to be unable to enjoy the rest of the day.  This, for me,  involved first of all, a coffee with Brian, who really ought to be blogging about his former life amongst the Inuit in the Hudson Bay area of Canada; his life long love of nature and the hills of Galloway and Scotland; his expeditions to Nepal to help with the building of a school and his more recent incarnation as a tour guide in the Himalayas, Sri Lanka and other places of which I only dream. He had chosen to defer his walk on the Merrick to hear me read.  

And then it was off to the County Buildings to hear Tom Heap being interviewed, intelligently I thought, by Andy Cassell, about his book Landsmart. This  champions the idea of regenerative agriculture. Inevitably, the subject of the proposed National Parks came up. “They’re a bit of red herring,” he said. “Unlike US national parks, they are not very good for nature as the land is still in private ownership.” He moved on to wind farms: “They don’t really take up a lot of space, unless you include the visual impact!”  He’s clear: we need major investment in the electricity grid and will just have to accept more pylons. He thought the money spent by the Tory Government on HS2 was squandered and should have been invested in our renewable infrastructure. As he signed my copy of his book I asked him about George Monbiot’s Regenesis, a more full on challenge to agriculture and, indeed, a challenge to our entire culture. “I’m not a polemicist,” said Tom Heap. “I’m a pragmatist.”  He paused to return my copy of his book and added, wanly: “But he sells more books than me.”

 At the same venue,  next up was Nigel Toon, to talk about his book How AI Thinks. His presentation, to a full house, was distinguished by both humour and clarity. There is a choice, he  suggested: “Are we going to make eight billionaires richer or are we going to make eight billion people richer?…We are the humans in charge of this stuff!” At question time, someone asked him when AI would make it possible to have a conversation with dolphins — apparently AI is helping to decode the communication which takes place between female dolphins and their calves.  Nigel smiled and opined that dolphins would probably not have much interest in communication with us. But then he dropped in a statistic that might have pleased George Monbiot.  “90% of all biology on earth is driven by us. Only 10% are dolphins.”  It was a slightly cryptic observation in which I think, the 10% of dolphins stands for all the surviving  species left living wild while the other 90% represents the  species displacement which has taken place in order to feed us all a meat based diet.  

Both events were brilliant, by the way, but daunting. I just don’t know when I’m going to find the time to read all these books that I have bought.

Notes and References

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Will Hutton at the Fringe… 

That’s the Kirkcudbright Fringe, by the way, where Will Hutton was promoting his new book, This Time No Mistakes, “a blueprint for a better future if the Labour Party takes it seriously.”[1] 

Well obviously, this was an important event, though I’d have to admit that, for pure Fringe entertainment, Guardian columnist, John Crace, was a greater pleasure and electoral commentator, Professor John Curtis, a joy. The latter is someone who plainly revels in being let off the leash of his more restrained television persona. For facts and figures presented with animated clarity, insight and humour, and occasional disparaging asides, he is an unbeatable political commentator. His framing of a possible future Scottish independence referendum was not one I had previously heard: a choice between one union, in which Scotland is currently a very significant if somewhat discontented fraction, and another, in which Scotland would be a very small part. However, fresh from addressing a group of Tory MPs, to explain to them exactly why they had got things so terribly wrong, Curtis was masterfully unbiased. Will Hutton on the other hand is an undisguised supporter of the Labour Party and so I was keen to hear the detail of his “blueprint.”  

Keir Starmer has called This Time No Mistakes, “a brilliant book…an intellectual, historical, political read with some strong themes … read it if you haven’t already. For me that endorsement starts very encouragingly and then falters a little. Will Hutton however was happy to tell us that he had recently been to watch the Arsenal with Sir Keir. They both support The Gunners and Will Hutton is obviously hopeful that his “blueprint” has wormed its way into the mind of the Labour bigwigs, despite what may be thought of as the contrary evidence of the winter fuel payments debacle and  Sir Keir’s opening pitch to the electorate, “Things will get worse before they get better” which sounds upsettingly like a repeat of George Osborne’s austerity.   

So, what is it that Will Hutton is on about? He is concerned, I think rightly, by the slide of the modern world towards unbridled individualism and wishes to promote instead, the “we” society.  Being in Scotland, I was initially thrown by this objective, hearing “wee” – as in small – rather than “we” as in collective, but having corrected that misstep, things started to make more sense. To properly report, I’ll need to read the book but here’s a few tasters gleaned from his Kirkcudbright Fringe appearance, supported by a little preliminary reading of the text and a recent Hutton Observer article with the very encouraging title, Labour needs billions to fund its plans – and I know where it can be found.[2] 

The Observer article offers quite a technical treatise, the essentials of which, Hutton assures us, are cited in the Labour manifesto. There are, he says, “1.4tn funds fossilised in Britain’s 5,100 defined benefit pension fund schemes.”  On the basis of a cursory inspection, the manifesto seems a little less explicit on this point but does say: “Labour will also act to increase investment from pension funds in UK markets.”  Now, that is a very appealing idea but not one which has, as yet, been loudly enough proclaimed. Indeed, as I walked out of the event I fell in with a couple, one of whom was clutching a signed copy of No Mistakes whilst complaining about Will Hutton’s uncritical endorsement of Sir Keir. “Our economy,” she said, “is not like a household budget.”  I think I can detect the influence of Yanis Varoufakis in this observation.[3] She carried on: “Why can‘t we just print money like they did in the pandemic?”  

Why indeed! I tried to “explain” that inflationary pressures, the policies of the Bank of England and the fear of a Truss like run on the pound may have something to do with this reluctance towards quatitative easing, but I could see my flounderings weren’t cutting much ice with my interlocuter, but the little I have gleaned from No Mistakes makes clear that the journey of the UK in the last 50 years has severely weakened the resilience of our economy to rebound from setbacks by means of such devices.   Will Hutton listed five “catastrophes” which define the UK’s decline in the modern era:  

  • Deindustrialisation under the government of Margaret Thatcher 
  • The financial crisis of Black Wednesday under Norman Lamont’s chancellorship in 1992 
  • The financial crash of 2007 to 2008 (under a Labour government which had failed to adequately regulate the financial sector) 
  •  Brexit in 2016 
  • The disaster of Kwasi Kwarteng’s budget during the ill-fated premiership of Liz Truss in 2022.   

In pondering this list, it occurred to me that Will Hutton had made no mention of the shortcomings of our electoral system. At the question stage of the event, I managed to grab the attention of the man with the roving mic and pointed out that a proportional system might have avoided at least three of these “catastrophes” – Thatcher, Brexit and Truss, would not have happened and I was pretty certain that neither would the other two “catastrophes”. So why didn’t the topic of electoral reform figure in his remarks?  

Will Hutton fielded this challenge with ease, assuring us that he has positive things to say about electoral reform in his book and, indeed, developed my counterfactual by pointing out that if there had been PR in the 1920s then, instead of a national government led by Ramsay MacDonald, wedded to the Gold Standard,  we might have had a coalition  led by that old goat Lloyd George and advised by John Maynard Keynes, delivering a New Deal for the UK before the idea ever got off the ground in the US.  When I search the text of No Mistakes I   find a number of favourable references to electoral reform including mention of the British Social Attitudes Survey in 2022 which found “a 51% majority in favour of electoral reform – witness to the growing recognition that the current system does not fairly represent the views of the electorate and encourages a politics that doesn’t work for the majority.” 

Proportional Representation is not, in itself, a solution to our problems, but could be   a possible means by which consensus may be established, to plot a way forward, though, where the greatest challenge of our age is concerned, climate change, I find it hard to see any  practical way forward other than, through fairer representation, giving political expression to the environmental consensus which already exists in the spectrum of opinion running leftwards from the centre.     

In the meantime, we are stuck with the present electoral system for the UK Parliament and no hint from Keir Starmer that he is paying attention to either his own party membership or the advice of Will Hutton on the matter. If you share my gloom on this and feel the possibility of electoral reform is a remote one, then I strongly advise you, by way of an antidote, to listen to the recent interview Leading episode titled How to fight fake news and strengthen democracyv  Rory and Alistair interview Audrey Tang, former Taiwanese Minister of Digital Affairs.  Tang, who has identified as “post-gender” and accepts “whatever pronoun people want to describe me with online,”[4] tells her extraordinary personal story but also documents the remarkable impact of her ideas and policies which have, amongst other things, overturned the endemic distrust of the Taiwanese people in their politicians such that they are now viewed with widespread positivity. Don’t expect the charisma of Sir John Curtis, the wit of John Crace or the policy heft of Will Hutton, but truly, you will not regret listening to this podcast. In the meantime, I must get back to my copy of This Time No Mistakes.  

Endnotes and References

1] This bold statement was on the  publicity blurb on the bookmark which I received in lieu of a signed copy of the book at the conclusion of the event. The book mark also carried Starmer’s endorsement.

2] Observer article:  Labour needs billions to fund its plans – and I know where it can be found. 

3] Yanis Varoufakis on Question Time responding to a question from an audience member who comparest the UK economy to his household budget.

4] How to Fight Fake News and Strengthen Democracy  Interview with Audrey Tang on the Leading podcast with Rory Stewart and Alistair Campbell.

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